Simple Sanity Tips
As I write the title to this one I giggle a bit. What IS sanity anymore anyway?
Regardless of this “new normal,” or whatever we’re calling it to make ourselves feel better, the bottom line remains the same. We have small humans to tend to while WE are losing our minds at times.
I’ve talked recently with several moms and the questions go a little something like this.
”How are you?”
”How are the kids?”
”What bottle of wine are you on this week (no judgement)?”
”What’s the funniest thing they’ve cried over this week?”
”What have YOU cried over this week?”
For starters, I’d like you to know that if your house is a mess (mine is), your kids are fighting more often (mine are), and your patience is wearing thin (umm yes) you’re STILL doing a good job. Honestly. This is an amount of mental work that we’re just not used to and we shouldn’t have to think that we are or that we need to “just deal with it” because of the situation.
Secondly, I’d like to share with you a few tips that we use around here to minimize friction and make the day smoother.
Smart Speakers
Do you have an Alexa or Google Home device? If so, that sucker has a “reminders” section that you can set and customize. You can access it through your phone app. If you haven’t downloaded that app for your smart speaker device, I highly recommend it.
In our house we have three reminders that go off during the day.
At 10:00 am our Alexa says “I’m reminding you, Snack Time.”
Now, WHY do you need this? It’s two fold here. The first is so I won’t forget that it is indeed snack time(“'Cause when the minutes seem like hours and the hours seem like days, Then a week goes by--you know it takes my breath away.” True 90s kids will get that 🎤 reference 😂)
The second is so that I only have to answer the “when’s snack-time” question once a morning versus once every 30 seconds.
Addy - ”Mom, is it snack time?”
Me - “Has Alexa said it was snack time?”
Addy - “No”
Me - “Then not yet. It’ll be snack time when she says so.”
End Scene (thank goodness).
At 1:00 PM our Alexa says “I’m reminding you, Nap & Quiet Time”
This one might be my favorite. This is because typically, children do not want to stop playing for nap or quiet time. But they also won’t argue with a device. If I say “it’s time for nap and quiet time” I get all the sass. BUT if Alexa says it… they, including the 20 month old, stop what they’re doing, collect their belongings and go upstairs without argument. It’s like some type of magic that I am too enamored with to question.
At 7:15 PM our Alexa says “I’m reminding you, Time to Clean Up.”
Much like the nap/quiet time reminder, this one gets less sass coming from the device than it does coming from a parent. I don’t question it, I just get excited to see living room floor again!Delivery EVERYTHING
This one might be more controversial but hear me out. During this time especially, I’m NOT leaving the house. In our family, Phil HAS to work outside the home, therefore, he is the only one who runs errands, goes to pick things up, or leaves anywhere that’s outside of walking distance. To minimize his trips AND to help support our local workers we use Instacart or local delivery options and we make sure to tip and tip well. If someone is out of work and needs to make money so they’re picking up personal-shopping or delivery jobs we’re happy to help support them. This keeps us out of the stores and puts money in the pockets of someone who might need it! We set up contactless drop-off and we’re very careful about bringing things into our home. On the flip side, we’ve been using delivery-type options for things we need during the week well before this current situation. In my mind, it is worth the few extra bucks to NOT pack up all the kids, lug them to the store, shop with distractions, forget 6 things, fight about candy, and so on… If my sanity had a price it would be well above the fees those services are charging.
Amok, amok, amok!
(or amuck, amuck, amuck, if you prefer)Most of us did not prepare for any of this. If your house, your emotions, or your priorities are in a big tornado of a mess, please don’t beat yourself up. Here are a few things to remember.
-No one is coming to visit. Literally, it’s not allowed. So the laundry can’t wait a couple of days to get put away, the sliding glass door can have finger prints on it for a while longer, and the kids can take ownership of their messy rooms.
-Your productivity will be different. If you’re like me and you’re both working from home AND trying to keep tiny humans from clawing one another apart the amount of time you have to devote to certain tasks will be less, just because of basic math! More Humans + More Responsibility / Work Tasks = Lower Productivity. Stay at home parents, your productivity will be less too, same math, same outcome. I’m working on allowing myself to understand that this is how it has to be for a while. I’m a high-achiever, and I say that not as something to brag about but to say it’s a character trait I have to work through. I thrive on completing things, marking stuff off of a list and being both efficient and over delivering. So with that, I’m struggling.
-Try new things, but only if you want to. If you have the time and opportunity to pick up a new hobby, paint the bathroom, or reorganize the pantry, go for it! If you don’t have the opportunity or the time don’t beat yourself up. No one is going to judge you for the cleanliness of your oven or the amount of murals you created during quarantine. They’re going to be happy you’re healthy and safe.
We are all navigating our home-based-lives as best we can. Our priorities are keeping the family safe & happy, making some positive memories, and in my case, cutting down on the pretzel intake.
If you have suggestions, questions, or if you just want to chat with someone whose youngest child walked across a zoom-Taekwondo-meeting without a diaper, reach out. I’ve got you!
Embrace the Chaos,
Meg
